Happy New Year? I'll just have to wait and see...

Well, 2007 is over and the new year is starting. I don't really know how to describe the past year - I've had some of the best times in my life, but also one of the worst. And aside from 3 standout months while I was travelling, the rest of the year was just average. That's why I've decided to definitely move off the Island this year - if I stayed, I'd only get to enjoy life during the few times I get to escape, and the rest of my life would be boring. At least in Montreal, I can start with a clean slate. Many of my friends have moved on and started a new phase in their lives, and it's time for me to do the same. It seems like some of us are drifting away from each other and meeting new friends, and some of us have just changed so much over the years that it would be good to make changes like that. Of course I do have friends whose friendship I value, but those aren't the only friends I'll have in my life. I met lots of new friends while in Seville, and I'll continue to make new friends after I move to Montreal. You win some, you lose some, I guess...

Nothing lasts forever. People change, times change, things change. And if the changes are so big that you can't adjust, why bother sticking to something you just don't like anymore? I just found out they're engaged, which brought back the old heartache again. I forgot it for a time last spring, when I was in a place far away and crazy over someone else, but that one didn't work out so when I found out that they were back together again, old feelings of depression that I thought were long gone started coming back, and though it wasn't as bad during the fall since I never saw either of them, I knew I couldn't be friends with her again. I don't care if my friends think I'm being reckless for breaking off a friendship with someone who I once considered to be my best friend, I knew that if I wanted to keep my sanity, I had to break ties with those who have hurt me. Keeping that friendship would only hurt me in the long run, so I have to do what I have to do. I'm not running away from my problems, I'm weeding out the things that have given me problems, and preparing to find happiness elsewhere. My friends advised me to find a good church-going Catholic guy, but every time people say that, all it does is make me think "I once loved one. I wasn't worth his heart."

Maybe I'll find love in Montreal, or elsewhere. Or maybe if I do, either I won't be worth his heart to begin with, or someone else will butt in and ruin any chance I might have had. I don't know, it seems like everyone I know is either getting married or having babies. Well, I'm not ready to have children, but years ago I figured I'd be either married or engaged by now. Though I remember what Antonio told me about the Spanish perspective on marriage - in Spain, most people want to be able to buy their own place before getting married, but since housing is expensive in Spain, most people can't afford it till their late 20s at the very least. So most Spaniards don't get married till their 30s, and they also have fewer children. He said that when he was in the US, he thought it was strange that some people he met there (and friends of friends) were getting married in their early-mid 20s. Actually, I remember he and his friends were mostly around 30 or so, and most were still single (both the men and the women). Actually, he said that people in general have the same viewpoint in many parts of Europe. I like that approach - no rush to get hitched and no need to pop out brat after brat for the next 15 years.

In other news, I'm doing Broadway Bound this week (and during the weekend too). I won't be able to go to the UPEI retreat because of that - Neal told me there were spots open for non-students, but in the end I had to decline because BB is something I'd been wanting to do for a long time and I might not have another chance. Anyway, BB is basically an intense dance workshop mostly on musical theatre dance, and at the end, everyone involved is in a showcase. This is apparently the fourth one, and since I wasn't able to do the last 3 (found out too late and couldn't get the time off work, and the third one happened while I was still in Seville), I jumped at the chance this time. I handed in a form for vacation time at work weeks ago as soon as I found out when it was going to be, and I got it! Yay!

In dance classes last month, I've been improving on some things. A year ago, I couldn't do multiple turns (I could land a clean single pirouette and double jazz turns but not much else) but last month, I was doing multiple fouettes! I've been doing well with singing too - I sang at my music studio's Christmas recital last month and got lots of compliments. In Montreal, I'll continue with song and dance, and I also want to get into more acting and learn to play the flute.

I was browsing around on YouTube a while ago, and found some clips filmed by tourists at La Carboneria during the time I was in Seville, I checked them out, and thought maybe I'd spot myself walking in the background or sitting in the audience. But I found two of me dancing! I remember that night - it was about a week after the robbery and I was finally starting to enjoy life again. After the show was over, I was dancing with some locals - in both clips, I'm the girl in the black pants and black/white top, with a silver flower in my hair:

Clapping out the compas and getting into rumbas -



Bailando por Sevillanas (dancing Sevillanas) -




Another flamenco gem I found - the bailaor (male flamenco dancer) in the white outfit is none other than Felipe the firecracker himself!