From tortilla to pizza, guapa to bella, Triana to Trastevere...

Well, my week and a half in Rome was AMAZING and I wish I could have stayed longer in this beautiful city. Here's what's been happening day by day:



Sunday:

Before leaving Seville, I went to the Basilica de la Macarena for Sunday Mass for one last time. I took some pictures of the beautiful church, and as I've said before, La Virgen Macarena is a statue of Mary crying and when I looked at her I'd feel as though she were speaking to me. Well, when I looked at her one last time, I thought "don't cry, I'll return someday..." I took some more pictures around town as an attempt to make up for my losses, then I finished my packing that night and took my flight out to Rome on Monday morning.


Monday:

I arrived in Rome that afternoon. I took the airport train to the Termini station (the main bus/train/subway station in Rome) and walked to the hostel (it's across the street from Termini). I got settled in and called Carlo to tell him I arrived. He and I decided to meet up on Thursday of that week.


Later that evening I decided to explore the city. I had a map and took the subway from Termini to Piazza di Spagna - the Spanish steps. Of course I had to see the Spanish steps, after spending 2.5 months in Spain! Then, I walked to the Trevi fountain and threw three coins in. According to some superstition, if you throw a coin in, you'll return to Rome. Two coins - fall in love in Rome. Three - get married in Rome. Well, it's only superstition but it's still nice to think about! Then, I continued to explore the city. So I walked all the way from the Spanish steps, to the Trevi fountain, to the Piazza del Popolo, to the river, along the river, and across a bridge to St. Peter's Square (which is sooooo beautiful at dusk!). And can you believe I was wearing strappy high heel sandals for the whole walk?! Hehehe, we dancers have tough feet... Actually, there were a few times when I thought of the last time I was in Rome - for World Youth Day in 2000. It was my first big overseas trip and since it was with a group, the chaperones would always bark at us to drop everything and follow, don't wander off, be in bed by midnight, dress properly, wear comfortable shoes, etc. Even then I knew I was too free-spirited for all those rules (which drove my chaperone crazy!). But on Monday night, I actually laughed out loud a few times because there I was, traipsing all over Rome by myself in a cute sundress and strappy high heels, doing whatever the frig I wanted. That's one of the things I love about travelling alone - I can go where I want, explore at my own pace, take my sweet time, and don't have to follow someone else's rules (heh, at WYD, the rules were mostly made for the tweens who have never wandered outside their hometown - too restrictive for free spirits and experienced travellers). Anyway, after dark I decided to go back to the hostel but the subway had already closed, so I took a cab. I was lucky actually, someone else who also wanted a cab to Termini happened to be there when I hailed it so we shared it and paid only about 4 euros each. Then, I went to bed.


Tuesday:

I decided to explore historic Rome that day. But since the Santa Maria Maggiore basilica is close to Termini, I went to see that first. It was soooo beautiful! At World Youth Day, my group went to see it, but it was supercrowded and so stuffy that I felt I was gonna pass out, so I didn't really get to enjoy it. But holy frig, that is one of the most beautiful churches I have ever seen! Then, I took the metro to the colosseum and spent some time exploring that. I also checked out the ruins close by and Santi Giovanni e Paolo church. Later that evening I went to the Trevi fountain again, it's so beautiful in the evening! Unfortunately, it's also supercrowded with tourists... Anyway, while I was sitting on the big rocks beside the fountain, some guy kept checking me out and taking pictures of me! He never talked to me, but he seemed interested... Also, some young street vendor close by asked me out, but I turned him down. Heh, back home no one wants me, but in Europe I actually have a chance to turn down guys (or say yes, depending on whether or not I'm interested!). Actually, several times during the week, I'd encounter men saying "ciao bella!" and things like that. One guy asked for my phone number but I wasn't interested so I said I have a boyfriend. He left me alone after that.


Wednesday:

I decided to explore St. Peter's Basilica that day. So I took the subway to the Vatican and went to the basilica. Definitely high on my list of "most beautiful churches". I'm glad I got to explore it at my own pace and really let it all soak in. I saw the Pieta close to one of the entrances, and for some reason, I was also thinking of La Virgen del Rocio when I looked at it. Well, La Virgen del Rocio is a fancily decorated statue of Mary holding Baby Jesus, and they've both got golden crowns and fancy clothes and jewelry. La Pieta is a simple stone statue of Mary holding her "baby" Jesus after His death... When I see these statues, I often think of that song "Mary did you know?" - I don't know if La Virgen knew that the little baby she was holding would grow up to save the world and die for us, but Mary in La Pieta saw her "baby" die on the Cross after all the good he did for the world. I also saw the treasury and the tombs of the popes. JPII's tomb was there and there were so many people standing by and kneeling to pray. Rest in peace John Paul II... I also bought some stuff at the Vatican bookstore and sent some postcards.


Later that afternoon, I walked down the river to Trastevere. That part of town reminds me of Triana in Seville - very old and "local", not a big tourist attraction. I stumbled upon a little store that sold religious items for really cheap and bought a few things. There were a few nuns shopping there too. I ended up paying 12 euros total for a nice rosary, prayer card, sparkly cross necklace, and little leather wallet. I continued exploring the neighbourhood - narrow winding cobblestone streets, little restaurants and shops, barely any tourists, and piazzas with beautiful statues and fountains. I also saw the Santa Maria in Trastevere church and it's also on my list of "most beautiful churches". It's quite fancy and the images and paintings remind me of Byzantine or Eastern Orthodox icons. I walked back to the hostel and on the way over, I saw the Pantheon. Rome can be a little confusing to navigate at times, but not near as much a maze as Seville.


Thursday:

I didn't do too much that morning and early afternoon, just mailed some stuff home and did some laundry. But later at 5, I met up with Carlo. For those of you who don't know, he and I met when I was in Rome for WYD - at one of the parties at Castelfusano. We exchanged addresses, wrote to each other for a year, lost touch, but then found each other again on the internet last year and when I said I might return to Rome he said he'd love to see me again so we decided to meet up. Anyway, we met up at Termini station and went for a drink at a cafe near the Piazza de Republicca. He gave me a cute journal with a picture of a kitten on it. Later, we went for a walk and he showed me some of the theatres where he's performed (he's a professional actor) and told me he's met some major ballet stars when he worked as an extra in the opera. I freaked out when he told me he met Roberto Bolle! One of my favorite dancers - if I could dance with anyone in the world, it would be him. And apparently, his physique is as impressive in person as in pictures/videos (frig, he has the body of a Greek god!) He also met Carla Fracci and that even though she's in her 70s now, she still has legs like a young person. I guess since I'm a dancer I'll still have a young body when I'm old, hehehe... I told him I walked all over Rome in high heels, and he couldn't understand how my feet could take it. He was also impressed that I could travel to foreign cities by myself without any fear (he said I must be a true traveller if I can do that). Anyway, he also said that if he has time while I'm still here, he'd like to take me out to dinner but in the end he was really busy and never had time. :( Oh well, maybe the next time I'm in Rome, or if he comes to Canada!

Carlo had to leave a while later to go to a rehearsal, so after our meeting I went back to Trastevere for the evening. Trastevere is so beautiful in the evening - it's filled with people but most are locals, not tourists. Close to the river at the bottom of the bridges, there were lots of street vendors selling their stuff and a few restaurants. And in the actual neighbourbood itself, I went to a bar that had a little buffet, actually lots of local bars do this - you order a drink (though drinks at those places are more expensive), and take as much food as you want (mostly hors d'oeuvres), I guess like a variation of going for tapas in Spain (except with tapas, you pay for them instead of taking from a buffet). Later, I went to the Piazza Navona and Campo dei fiori. Those places have lots of restaurants and bars filled with tourists and locals. There are also street performers and vendors. Later, I went back to the hostel on the bus.


Friday:

I moved to a different hostel that day so I packed up my stuff and went to Hostel Alessandro Palace, which is also close to Termini. I was in a 4 person coed dorm, and turns out I was the only girl! But I didn't worry - the guys there were friendly and didn't try to hit on me (2 Americans, one Brazilian). I got settled in, and did a little shopping later. I bought a cute pair of shoes - platform wedges with Italian leather straps - and only paid 30 Euros! These were easier to walk in than the strappy high heels, though the only problem I had with the high heels is that sometimes the heel would sink into the space between cobblestones and get stuck, so I'd have to yank my foot out. I think it was also that day that I bought another cute sundress - it's a bright pink colour (kinda like the inside of a watermelon, but a little brighter), I already have lots of little black dresses so I got this one in a bright colour instead. Only 24 Euros - also really cheap!

Later that evening, I went to the hostel bar and talked to a few people. A group of us (including 2 of my dorm mates) decided to go out on the town later so we went to a lounge called the "Ice Club". It literally is an ice club - they use hard-core air conditioning to lower the temperature to minus 5, and so everyone there has to wear a thermal cape and gloves when going in. The walls are ice and the drinks are served in an ice glass. It was quite interesting, but I would have preferred a place where I could dance and party instead of just sit around freezing my ass off. Later, the others also wanted to go out and dance so one of them asked some teen guy where the discos are. The guy said that they're in Testaccio (another district in Rome) so we took taxis to go there. The street with all the discos in Testaccio is awesome - there are all sorts of bars/discos and lots of people. The only downside is that there are also a lot of sleazy guys in that area. My roommates went home early because one of them drank too much (it was his birthday and he did too many shots) and got sick, but I found the rest of the group (we took separate taxis) in a bar called Coyote. We didn't stay too long though, because the girls got tired. I didn't have to worry when I was with that group - the lone guy there was very protective and refused to leave me to fend for myself. They stayed with me till I could get a taxi (they were at a different hostel so they took another cab later).


Saturday:

I decided to take a little trip to Tivoli that day. It's a small town outside of Rome and so pretty! Lots of hills, narrow winding cobblestone streets, an old stone castle, and the Villa d'Este. That villa is sooooo beautiful! It belonged to an archbishop in the olden days and has all sorts of gardens, fountains, etc. Definitely worth seeing. I also saw some pretty churches and piazzas. After I got back to Rome that evening, I talked to some more people in the hostel bar and a group of guys from New Jersey wanted to go out. I told them about Testaccio and so a big group of us decided to go - the 5 NJ guys, an Irish couple, and me. The Irish ended up not going after all so I went with the guys. We went to Coyote and had fun. The guys didn't want to dance but I still had fun, and I had a little flirtation with a guy named Marco. Actually, he was like an Italian version of Terence! Hehehe... Anyway, around 3 or 4am, the guys and I took a taxi back to the hostel.


Sunday:

I wanted to go to Mass at Santa Maria Maggiore since it's close to the hostel but I couldn't find the Mass times. But I did find the Mass times for St. Peter's Basilica on the internet so I decided to go there. I checked out St. Paul's basilica early in the afternoon (another beautiful church), and went to the evening Mass at St Peter's. It was in Italian and I actually felt privileged to attend Mass at St. Peter's. It's such a beautiful place and the headquarters of the Church... I didn't do much later that evening but I decided that on Monday I would take a little trip to Assisi.



Monday:

I went to Assisi that afternoon. My WYD group had gone in 2000, but I didn't know anything about St. Francis and St. Clare back then, and since it was so crowded because of WYD, I was ready to pass out when I was in the basilica. But this time I got to explore on my own pace and it was worth it. Actually, one of the reasons I decided to return to Assisi is because a little while before coming to Europe, I was in the St. Theresa's Parish bookstore back home and there was a basket with saint names in it. If I wanted, I could pick a name and, according to tradition, it's actually the saint that picks me and wants to spend time with me. I was totally expecting to get some obscure saint that I've never heard off, but I got St. Clare of Assisi! My first thought was "I guess I'm going to Assisi then!" - picking her name was what sealed my commitment.

Anyway, the first thing I did when I arrived in the village was check out the St. Francis basilica. I remembered it, but this time I really got to see it without huge crowds. It is sooooo beautiful! I also saw the tomb of St. Francis, and since I know that Neal has a great love for St. Francis, I asked him to pray for Neal. Later, I walked around town and like Tivoli, it's an old village straight out of the olden days. I went to the St. Clare basilica and prayed at her tomb. Also, the San Damiano crucifix that spoke to St. Francis is in the St. Clare basilica. I continued walking around and bought a book on the life of St. Clare. Then, when it was time for me to return to Rome, I started talking to two guys from Chile who were also heading back to Rome on the same train. Then, we talked to two Brazilians who were also going back to Rome. The train was late but when it came we all continued chatting together. We had to switch trains later and our next one was late too (ugh, Italian trains...) but that didn't ruin our day. When we got back to Rome, we all exchanged emails and I went back to the hostel to sleep.



Tuesday:

I went to visit the Vatican museum. It was sooooo worth the 13 Euro entry price! All the paintings, statues, objects, etc were so impressive and of course there was the Sistine chapel! Except so many people were taking pictures with flash even though it's not allowed, and I kept thinking "stop destroying the frescoes!" (apparently, flash fades the paint). Aside from the Sistine chapel, I also loved the "Rafael rooms" with all the frescoes by Rafael. I love old paintings... I also bought some nice fancy bookmarks in the museum gift shop. I took the subway back to Termini and walked around for a bit, and later that evening I met some Canadian guys from Manitoba in the hostel and they were talking to two Italian girls they had met earlier. We all went for pizza/supper at a restaurant near the hostel and the girls said they were going to the Spanish steps later. Their friends called and they said they'll go meet up with their friends and come back, but they never did. So the guys and I ended up having to pay for their food. Thankfully, it was only about 8 euros more for each of us, so no biggie. Now I'm just going to go to sleep because I'm flying out in the morning. Arrivederci Roma...

Late nights at La Carbonería, flamenco party at Taller, and preparations for Rome...

Well, I'm leaving Seville tomorrow morning and heading off to Rome. I'll miss this place but with all the crap that happened to me in the past few weeks, I think I'm ready to leave. At least when I go to Rome, I can start with a clean slate and have a better recovery from what happened earlier this month.

I still had fun in the past week or so. I still went to La Carbonería many times and the thing I love most about that place is that there is something different every night. After the flamenco show is over, the locals jam and you never really know what to expect. On Tuesday, it was a boring night so I went home early, but on Wednesday I got to dance Sevillanas on the stage in front of the whole crowd (the flamenco show people asked for two volunteers to dance Sevillanas and of course I went for it!) and lots of people gave me compliments. Another time, a few locals were jamming and one of them, who is obviously classically trained in singing, started singing latin jazz standards as some other guy was playing the piano. I think the singer might have been a tuno (traditional musicians who dress like medieval/renaissance minstrels and sing classic Spanish songs for the public - I saw a few of these groups in Salamanca years ago) because of the way he sang and carried himself. He was AMAZING!

During the week, I met up with Antonio and his girlfriend for tapas and a drink. We went to the same little cafe where I usually went. Juan was there, and told me that he saw a guy on a motorcycle grab some Japanese woman's purse recently. The Barrio Santa Cruz is always filled with tourists so all the thieves try their luck there. And apparently, Asian tourists are a common target - I'm guessing the thieves assume they have more money and carry expensive electronics. Anyway, while we were waiting for our food, who should show up but Mauro! He was still friendly with me as always - two-cheek kiss and some chit-chat, and I introduced him to my friends. I told him about the robbery and this was probably the first time I didn't fight back tears when talking about it. Mauro told me he's going to La Carbonería later, if I want to go too. When he left, I told Antonio that he's the guy I like (I had told him about the Flute Cutie saga) and Antonio said that I seemed really happy when talking to him. It's true - there's just something about Mauro that lifts up my mood. Every time I see him, even if I know I can't have him...

So I went to La Carbonería later that evening. He was there and when I saw him sitting alone on the terrace, I went to chat with him. I wasn't flirty anymore - I just treated him in the same way I treat any guy I'm friends with. He said he quit his job at the cafe a while ago and is now unemployed but is happy to chill out for a while. He also went to Morocco recently. Later in the conversation, he left and from the way he excused himself, I figured he probably just went to get another drink or chat with someone else, and would come back. But he never did and I didn't see him again that evening. How rude is that?! Frig, if he was planning on leaving for the night, I would normally assume he would say goodbye with a two-cheek kiss like he always did. Anyway, I still stuck around and enjoyed the music, then I took a cab home.

On Friday, I didn't go to La Carbonería because Taller Flamenco (the flamenco school) had a party on the terrace of the school building. I went and had a great time. I chatted with Phil from Quebec (one of the guitar students) and he said he's moving to Montreal next year so we exchanged emails and we'll probably see each other at flamenco events when we're both living there. Actually, there were a lot of Quebeckers at the flamenco school - flamenco is quite popular in Quebec. Aside from Phil, there was a woman from Rimouski and a girl around my age from Quebec City at the school a few weeks ago. I danced a lot and Pulga (guitar teacher - his real name is Francisco but his nickname is El Pulga) said "olé Canada!¨ I had also brought my pointe shoes and attempted some pointe/flamenco fusion and some people were quite impressed! One of the Spanish guys playing guitar and singing was totally flirting with me - calling me guapa (gorgeous) and kissing my hand. His name is José Luis and he claims he taught himself to play flamenco guitar (no lessons - and flamenco guitar is hard!). He kinda looked like a Spanish Noah Wyle. One time when I took my pointe shoe off, he said I have nice feet - holy frig, I NEVER get compliments on my feet! They're always either too big, too narrow, not arched enough, etc (ugh, can you tell I hate my feet?). Anyway, even though he was a little too short for me (in heels I was taller than him) I thought he was kinda cute (though not the most gorgeous guy I've ever seen) so I played along with the flirtation. He offered to walk me home (the flamenco school is about 10-15 minutes away from my place) and since he's friends with people from the school, I trusted him. We walked home, and he kept giving me kisses on the way over! What I like about Spanish men - they flirt if they're interested and if you show interest back, they don't pull away. Unlike heartbreakers like Mauro who just seem to enjoy tugging on girls' heartstrings and pull away from anyone who's worth more than just a one-night stand.

Last night, I met up with Kristeen (turns out it's spelled "Kristeen" and not Christine) and Matilda and we went for tapas. After, she had to go put Matilda to bed but I went to La Carbonería again and had lots of fun. The crowd that evening was younger and more lively. I talked to some Turkish guys that are here for some cultural project. I also enjoyed some more flamenco music and danced. Sevillanas, rumbas, tangos (fyi, tango flamenco is NOTHING like Argentine tango), alegrías, bulerías, I love it all! I brought my pointes that evening too and again, people were impressed and some girl was taking pictures of my feet! Hehehe...

Today, I'm just spending my time packing and getting my stuff ready to go to Italy. Adios Sevilla (I'll return someday...), ciao Roma!

Picking up the pieces...

Well, things are a little better now. I finally got my new bank card and was able to make changes in my travel plans. If this robbery hadn't happened, I'd be in Barcelona right now, probably exploring the Temple de la Sagrada Familia or hiking out to Montserrat to see the shrine to la Moreneta (the Black Madonna). But no, I'm still in Seville. I bought a new digital camera (also bought insurance for it too) but it's not the same. For about a week after the robbery, I'd have random crying fits and panic attacks over petty things. It's not as bad now, but this is definitely the worst thing that has ever happened on my travels.

I saw Juan at the cafe but I don't think Mauro works there anymore. There is a new waiter and for some reason, the cafe seems to have lost its magic. Without Mauro and his smiles and chit-chat, it's just a cafe like all the others, it's not the same anymore. Juan confessed that he likes me, but I told him "to me, you're a friend" and he said "friend with a right to love?" I said "no, just a friend, nothing more". He understood. And he tried to comfort me after the robbery - gave me a flower, called me me beautiful and said "what Mauro won't say to you, I'll say". But he didn't try to hit on me anymore. I later told Christine about Juan confessing his feelings, and she told me "Juan is married and has children!" :-0 Frig, it seems like in Sevilla, marriage doesn't stop men from hitting on other women... She told me she always gets hit on by married men and she also thinks it's disgusting. Actually, remember when I mentionned those guys at the feria who picked me up and took me around to different casetas? One of those guys was wearing a wedding ring (but he wasn't near as flirty as the others, thank goodness! He mostly just chatted and danced Sevillanas with me, the other guys were flirting). And a few weeks ago, I saw him (well, I think it was him... looked a lot like him anyway) at the Basilica de la Macarena after Mass with his wife and kids.

I met up with Antonio and we went to the cafe together. He also tried to comfort me and when I said "I should have put my pictures on cd..." he told me not to have regrets - it already happened and it's no use regretting something that can't be changed. He also told me that his roommate's friend got the same type of attack on the same street on the night before it happened to me (probably the same thief) and she lost her camera too. He also said that he accidentally left his camera in a taxi in Madrid a while ago when he was there to take his big exam (and never got the camera back even after calling all 36 cab companies in Madrid so it was probably stolen by the next person who took the cab).

Bruno (one of the guitar students at the flamenco school - from California) told me not to live life in fear because of this, so instead of staying home and crying all the time, I decided to keep going to La Carbonería. I went on Wednesday after dinner with Antonio, and Christine was there with Matilda and a few other friends. One time, I heard some random flamenco singing and knuckles hitting the wooden tables in a flamenco beat and saw that it was a group of young guys (late teens, early 20s). I started dancing and they all complimented me. They described me as "Una Canadiense con compás" - a Canadian with rhythm. Matilda also danced, she's such a little cutie! Two Mexican men came later and chatted with us too. I kept on dancing as these guys were singing and knocking out the beat on the table. Later, they got me to dance a Sevillana with some guy who looked just like a gypsy version of Andrew Chaisson! Anyway, I had fun with them and for the first time in a week, I actually smiled a real smile. Later, there was more music and jamming, and I kept on dancing for the crowds. Then, Mauro came in with his flute (unfortunately, he didn't play). Even though I know I can't have him, seeing his face with that cute smile and those eyes full of passion lifted my mood a little more, and while he watched me dance he said "olé Amélie!" (hehehe... it's so cute how he pronounces it "emilee"!). That was a fun night, and there were a few times that I actually laughed for the first time in a long time. When I decided to go home, I didn't want to take any chances anymore, so I went to a bigger avenue nearby and hailed a cab. I don't think I'll ever have the confidence to walk home at night even though the robbery was an exception rather than the rule, and most of the city is supposed to be safe.

I went again on Thursday and though I didn't dance as much, I still enjoyed the music. And again on Friday too. Had a nice little chat with a local guy named José who has been to Canada (Niagara Falls). He tried to guess how old I was and said 28 - he was shocked to find out I was 24! He said I seem more like a woman than like a girl, and that most of the foreigners he knows who are studying flamenco dance are in their late 20s and older. I guessed he was around 28, but turns out he's 38! He said people always think he's younger than his age. I returned to La Carbonería again on Saturday and danced Sevillanas and rumbas with some local women. Then, a group of men started playing music and singing. A gypsy guy was playing guitar and some other guys were taking turns singing. Flamenco singing is so passionate, and I always enjoy hearing a good cantaor (flamenco singer). These guys were amazing! Later, the bar was closing so they took the party outside to the street. They kept on singing and playing guitar, and I danced. There were a few other tourists there too and one of them took lots of pictures. He gave me his email and said if I send him a message he can send me the pics (I told him what happened with my camera). Then last night (Monday) I ran into him again at the Alameda de Hercules. It was great to see him again, he's a nice guy.

There is a new student living in a room in the same apartment as me now - a Mexican girl named Fernanda. She's also studying flamenco dance. The landlady lives there and has 2 spare rooms that she rents out to foreign students - I have one and Fernanda has the other room now.

I've lost weight since taking the flamenco classes. My stomach is actually flat now! And I've improved a lot in my dancing too. On my last day of flamenco classes, I was able to do a move in Felipe's class that isn't that complicated, but still a challenge. And I was able to do it fast! I remember seeing something similar in a YouTube clip of Joaquin Cortés, and thinking "WHOA!" - his feet made a sound like a drumroll. And I did it too! Even Felipe seemed a little impressed! (and I thought it was impossible to impress Felipe...). And at the ballet studio, I've improved a lot on pointe. Before coming to Seville, turns on pointe were pretty much impossible for me, but a few weeks ago, I did half a pique turn, and last week I actually did a pirouette on pointe! I can also do one-footed releves on pointe in the center too.

I'm flying to Rome on Monday. I booked hostels and Carlo and I are going to meet up sometime while I'm there. I haven't fully recovered from this incident yet, but things are finally starting to get better.

Still sad and paranoid, don't know when or if things will be better

I'm still paranoid and sad because of what happened last week. This was supposed to be my dream trip and now this happened... I thought nothing could bring me down. Not being stranded at the airport when I arrived, not getting scammed out of a few euros by a pushy "fortune teller" and some teen girl at the feria, not the hellish taxi wait at the feria, not minor injuries and illness (even the time I was in bed for 2 days with food poisoning because of something I ate in El Rocio - probably the raw shrimp - don't worry I have recovered), not even a failed attempt at romance (and everyone who knows me knows I don't handle rejection very well). But the robbery killed my confidence and my happiness and even though I'm thankful it wasn't worse, it still hurts.


I talked to Antonio and he told me the exact same thing happened to his French roommate the night before it happened to me. Apparently she was coming out of La Carboneria and got mugged by some guy with a gun. Probably the same guy. Antonio thinks that if 2 girls reported it within the same week, there will probably be more police protection there from now on. He also thinks the thief was probably a foreigner - apparently Spanish thieves use knives to threaten people (oh gee - remind me not to encounter a Spanish thief while I'm here) rather than guns. He also told me that a while ago while he was in Madrid, he accidentally left his digital camera in a taxi (well, shit happens but in my case I got the scare of my life).


I haven't seen Mauro since last week but Christine had told me something about him that I didn't like hearing - she said she saw him at La Carboneria late at night (a few days after I gave him my number), jamming with some other musicians, and he had some drunk Australian tourist hanging all over him. Apparently he seemed into it. Christine said "girls seem to like you" and he said "I like girls!" and since the tourist was obviously drunk out of her mind Christine said "uh, are you going to take advantage?" and he said yes. She also told me that this girl looked like a Barbie - long straight blond hair, tight jeans, silver belt, slutty top (Christine said that those types of girls are all over Australia and she's disgusted by that look), and that she was only in Seville for 2 days (Christine talked to her sister). Well, maybe that's why he didn't want me - I wasn't an easy lay. Though he doesn't know about my morals and commitment to save sex for marriage (we never actually talked about religion or anything like that), he and I had actual conversations and I didn't act like some drunken bimbo around him. I'm not into the Paris Hilton look/act - I'm better than that. But I keep thinking - why would someone so gorgeous, talented, charming, etc want nothing more than an easy lay? I thought he'd be into classy girls like me... Maybe Nathan was right when he said "forget about him, the last thing you need is a case of syphilis".


El Rocío was amazing. I took the bus there on Saturday evening and stayed till about midnight or so - I didn't camp out. As soon as I saw the statue of La Virgen del Rocío in the church, I thought "I've wanted to see you for so long..." And I prayed directly in front of her. There were so many people there, and I saw a woman crying and another one singing a devotion song to La Virgen del Rocío. Most of us were wearing flamenco costumes. And I'm glad I bought the leather boots, there is so much sand in that village, it's like a friggin' beach! I also bought some medallions and a rosary (the rosary was also stolen by the thief). All the different hermandades (brotherhoods - groups of people from each region of Spain) presented themselves to La Virgen, so all evening I would hear someone announcing "viva la virgen del rocío!" and the crowd would shout "viva!" "viva la blanca paloma!" (long live the white dove - another nickname for la Virgen del Rocío) "viva!" "viva la hermandad de... " (long live the brotherhood of... wherever they were from) "viva!" "viva la madre de dios" "viva!" There was music everywhere (Sevillanas, of course!) and everyone was enjoying themselves. That's the type of pilgrimage I like - when people celebrate like that. When it was getting dark I knew I had to catch the bus back to Seville but I was soooo tempted to call Mauro! I kept thinking "But El Rocío is so beautiful and romantic at night, and I look sooooo tempting in my flamenco dress!" but in the end I fought the temptation and returned to town. I figured if it turned out he didn't like me back, he'd make an excuse not to meet me anyway.

The next day, I took the bus back to El Rocío. I walked around for a while and one time I walked past a house where people were having a party, and someone in the house invited me in. She was quite insistent that I come in so I joined them. I danced Sevillanas with them and had a good time. One woman was playing castanets while dancing Sevillanas and I wish I had that kind of coordination! They also chatted with me and invited me to stay for supper. They passed around different plates of hors d'oeuvres and kept piling food onto my plate. They saw I look Asian and one man there said that his daughter is from China (I'm guessing he adopted a girl from a Chinese orphanage). Actually, apparently a lot of Spanish families are adopting Chinese girls from orphanages - I've seen several Spanish families in Seville with a Chinese baby or toddler, and even at the feria I saw a Spanish mother with her Chinese daughter in full flamenco costume! They also invited me to stay to pray the rosary. It's traditional for the Rocío pilgrimage to pray the rosary at midnight on Monday. Outside, people were walking past with candles and other things and others were playing music and dancing.

Then, when it was time for rosary, the family gave each of us in the house a candle and shut out the lights, then we prayed in front of an image of La Virgen del Rocío. They made petitions/requests after every decade, and when a tiny little boy made a petition, my first thought was "bless him!" I didn't say anything out loud but I prayed that Mauro forgive me for being too eager and that we be on good terms (whether good terms be friendship or romance). Later during the rosary I kept thinking of how the Blessed Mother loves us all and has the power to intercede on our behalf, and though I already knew that, it really made sense that night and the feeling was so beautiful that I started crying. At the end when they turned the lights back on the family saw me wiping my nose and they agreed with me that the rosary is such a beautiful prayer. Then, one of the women took me to the house where the brotherhood of Algeciras (where she is from) was staying and introduced me to a few people. I also got to walk with them in front of the church.

Later, we went close to the church for the big event - when a group of young guys from Almonte jump the fence surrounding the statue, lift up the statue and parade it around the village. We waited for a long time but at 3am, the Church bell started ringing and out came the statue! My eyes lit up when I saw la Virgen and the woman standing with me was obviously touched by what she saw in me. The statue must have been heavy because it kept tilting sideways but just seeing it was such a wonderful experience. When they took the statue elsewhere, I decided to return to Seville so I took the bus back. But the family that took me in exchanged emails and addresses with me and said they'd send their pictures. I had taken so many pictures myself with my own camera (including a pic of the statue that I was really proud of - postcard quality), but now those are lost :(

Then on Monday I woke up horribly sick. I figured it was food poisoning and I guess it was probably the raw shellfish the family fed me. I stayed in bed all day. On Tuesday I felt better and was able to walk around but I still felt sick. Wednesday I was probably 80% recovered and life could get back to normal. Thursday I felt fine. Then Thursday night/early Friday morning that f--king thief ruined everything for me.

Hands down, the scariest and most devastating thing that's ever happened to me

So on Thursday night, I was leaving La Carboneria after a fun night with Christine, her daughter, and her Aussie friend Alex, and I took the path I always take - it's well-lit and there's usually people coming and going. Anyway, I walked past some random dude who was sitting around doing nothing, and then turned the corner into the next street. Then, random dude runs up behind me, grabs my purse and tries to steal it. I screamed "AYUDA AYUDA!" (help!) and then freaked out even more when I saw he was holding a gun. Since he didn't seem to know how to use it and it looked fake and was making plastic sounds I guess that's what prompted me to keep screaming and struggling instead of just drop the bag. Anyway, I fell down and he yanked my bag away and ran off.

I kept screaming for help and people arrived and asked what happened. One of the good samaritans who showed up had a bike and went off in the direction the thief went. A few minutes later he came back with my purse and a piece of the toy gun the thief had tried to scare me with. But things were missing - my wallet (with money, cards, and driver's license), my cell phone, and (this is the most devastating part for me - I still cry about it) my digital camera with all my pictures. The good samaritans tried to calm me down and called the police for me.

The cops showed up and we gave a description of the thief so that the police could send a message to the other officers in the area to search for this jerk. Then, they took me to the station to file a report. They also took me to the emergency room in case I was injured (all I had were a few scrapes on one arm and a bruise on the other so the doctor just wiped some antiseptic on the scrapes). We went back to the station to finish off the reports and stuff and then they drove me home.

I couldn't sleep for the rest of the night and spent most of it praying for a miracle to get my stuff back. I prayed to St. Anthony (patron of miracles and lost items), St. Jude (patron of hopeless causes) and a few others, and prayed the rosary. I have a stronger love for the Blessed Mother now (especially after being in El Rocio - I had an amazing spiritual experience there) and begged her to pray for me. But no miracles - chances are, I'll never get my stuff back. Cards can be cancelled and replaced and it's easy to get a cheap phone here, but I can never get my pictures back. So what if I can take new ones of the Cathedral and other places around town? The photos that meant the most to me were the ones I can never replace - the feria, El Rocio, my friends, etc. All I've got are the ones I posted here a while ago.

I thank God for the good samaritans who helped me (especially the guy with the bike who got my purse back) and for the police who showed up and helped me after (even if it probably won't do anything to get my stuff back). And I definitely thank God that all the thief wanted was the bag (don't even want to think of what else he could have done to me) and that the only physical harm I got were scrapes and bruises. But that doesn't erase the pain of losing my camera and photos.

The next morning I went to class and told people what happened. Lourdes said that she's had her digital camera stolen twice in Seville (she also agreed with me that it's devastating to lose pictures) and someone else said that when he was in London, he got mugged and his camera got stolen too. Since I was so sleep-deprived, I was struggling through Lourdes' class so I knew I wouldn't be able to handle Felipe's class. I told Felipe what happened and said I can't participate that day and he understood. Actually, this is the first time he was actually nice to me - he was concerned about me and was glad that I wasn't physically hurt, and told me to calm down and get some rest. My landlady (God bless her) lent me some money and said I can borrow more if I want till I get my new bank card and also said that if I want to stay longer I can if I want to. I went to visit Christine yesterday and she told me she had her camera stolen once too. It's common, but still devastating. My dream trip to Spain where I finally got to experience things that I've wanted to do for years (feria, El Rocio, etc) - and now I've lost my pictures of those.

Normally, I'd leave Seville on the 10th, but I think I'll just cancel Barcelona and stay a while longer. I might just head straight to Rome after that. This whole incident has thrown a monkey wrench into my plans and since I don't want to have to hurry to clean up the mess, get stuff ready, and be stressed out on my last week, I think I need to have an extra week here at least till things calm down for me. I should receive my cards next week, and I'll buy a new digital camera (and take pictures around Seville even if I can't replace the ones I loved most). I'll spend some time with friends and try to enjoy the extra time here. I sent a message to Carlo telling him I'll be in Rome in a few weeks and he definitely wants to see me again.

Friends, please pray for me, even after a full night's sleep and a big healthy breakfast my mind is still numb and I still cry at random times. What I wouldn't give for things to be the way they were on Thursday afternoon - when my biggest gripes were Mauro not being interested and Felipe yelling at me for sticking my ass out and using too much turnout (I'm a ballet dancer, what the frig did you expect?!). I need a hug...